Tag Archives: #loveconquersall

ALZ SUX!

I love my mom.

 
My mom has vascular dementia/Alzheimer’s Disease.
 
 
The progress of her disease has been much quicker than I thought or hoped. When it was found out that she had Alzheimer’s I felt and conveyed to my family that she could have years and years of cognitive skill remaining. She was mobile and strong. She ate well and could be as quick witted as ever.
 
 
And now, less than 18 months since her diagnosis, my mother has become bed-ridden, has to eat pureed foods and is, for the most part, non-verbal. On rare and wonderful times, you receive a glint of recognition in her eyes as she stares at you. Other times, she only recognizes the love of her life, my father.
 
 
My once vibrant, beautiful and outspoken mother has become a smaller, quieter yet still beautiful version of herself.
 
 
It gets harder each time I visit her because I see less of my wonderful mom. And I don’t want to lose that picture in my head of her as she was before the disease. I want to carry that memory to share with my children when they are old enough to retain it.
puzzlealz
 
 
Along with watching the vitality withdraw from my mother, I am struck with thoughts of things that can never be again. I could always talk to my mom, about anything, I mean anything. When I wanted to know things about my childhood, she always quick to tell me those memories. I learned to be a strong outspoken woman and to give as good as I got. Mom has always told my sisters and I that we were smart and beautiful. Always smart first because that was the important one.
 
 
When my children get sick, my first reaction is “I need to call my mom she will have the best way to handle things”. I am saddened by the fact that my daughter will never know my mom the way that I did. The hip-swinging don’t give a damn about anything woman that I remember from my childhood. My mom has always been fearless and ready to take on whatever comes her way.
 
 
 
Alzheimer’s is a horrible disease. In my opinion it is far worse than an illness* that wears away at the body because while horrible, the ravages of the body can be seen and felt by both the victim and the loved ones. Alzheimer’s is a sneaky underhanded disease that affects the mind sometimes long before the victim or loved ones notice the damage. It is unknown how long my mom has suffered with the disease, only how long we noticed the aftereffects.
 
 
 
So as this blog is my vocal outlet, I would just like to say, loud and clear:
 
ALZHEIMER’S SUCKS!

alzsuxcandy

#alzheimerssucks #endalz #findacure #memoriesshouldlastforever

*This comment is in no way meant to lessen the pain of other diseases or illnesses. Simply a statement of my opinion on how this particular disease is so sneaky. If I had my way I would eliminate all illnesses because they all tear us from each other.*

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My Dad

My dad with my baby Michaela

My dad with my baby Michaela

My dad is a great man. Bless his heart, he put up with, er I mean raised, four daughters. He has always worked hard to provide for his family and been there for my mom and all of us girls. I say girls, but I’m the youngest and I’m 40.

He treated us with respect and love, unless we fought with momma. In that case, heaven help you, you were going to receive that white upper lip. That upper white lip was usually your only sign that Dad was unhappy. I don’t really recall it ever going further. But as for me, just seeing the lip was enough to know that I had overstepped the line.

And although I still learn life lessons from dad, there are some that I hope to transfer on to my own children.

  • You should always know how to change a tire….I’m pretty sure he taught all four of us how to do it.
  • If no one is in the room, turn the light off….Always said this when we all lived at home, and I already say it to my son.
  • Never sign your name to something without reading itsigning my first car finance was when I learned this one.
  • Take a chance and help peopleDad always stopped to help people if they were having car trouble.
  • Whatever job you do, do it to your best ability….Dad worked his jobs with loyalty, perseverance and diligence. Always.
  • Always kiss your partner goodbyemom and dad had a ritual. When either one left for work, the other was at the door waving and kissing bye. Proud to say, I try to always do this with Mickey.
  • Support your partner in all thingsmy best example is after moving into their home mom wanted to tear down walls, dad was right there beside her.
  • Treat your partner like royaltyDad has always, even to this day, done everything he could for mom.
  • Stand by your partner through everything….My mom has a form of Alzheimer’s and is in a nursing home. My dad is there every single day, rain or shine. He feeds her, takes her on walks, watches tv with her. Anything he can to just be with her. #Alzheimerssucks #loveconquersall

I love my dad and appreciate everything that he does and has done for me and our family. And I hope that I can be as great a parent as both of mine are.