I don’t know if anyone has read about the killing spree that took place at UCSB or the manifesto left behind by the disturbed young man responsible, but it has made me think about my babies and how they perceive themselves and others.
The killer seemingly blamed everyone but himself. He blamed his mother for not marrying into a wealthy family after his parents divorce. He blamed the girls attending college with him because they wouldn’t date him. He blamed couples on campus for having what he envied-a relationship. He video taped himself saying that he would “make them pay”. He later used his car, a knife and three guns to terrorize a campus, consequently killing six souls, injuring more and taking his own life.
Horrible though this is, the thoughts that it leaves behind with me are about my own children. I think about how their father and I are raising them.
My son: Are we raising him to respect women? Will he continue to see them as princesses or as objects? Will he appreciate all that we did for him even though we aren’t rich and he doesn’t get everything he wants? Will he be confident enough in himself to deal with rejection? Will he find acceptable outlets for his anger, that don’t include violence to women or anyone for that matter? Will he accept responsibility for his actions?
My daughter: Will she be confident enough to stand up for herself? Will she know that she is beautiful whether she fits into others view of what beauty is? Will she stand firm under pressure? Will she know that she is more than her bra size? Will she appreciate all that we did for her even though we aren’t rich and she doesn’t get everything she wants? Will she ask for help when she needs it? Will she accept responsibility for her actions?
I love my children very much. I hope they live prosperous lives and know at all times that they are always the center of my universe. But I know that they are not perfect, because well, lets face it, who is. Just like myself and everyone else, they will always be a work in progress. But while daddy and I are guardians of their lives, I hope and pray that we provide them with the tools they need to answer “yes” to all of the above.
Thoughts and prayers go out to the families that lost children in this horrific incident.
#yesallwomen and #notallmen